How to become the best Mom and Dad ?
Parents are role models to children. Parents play a major role in the upbringing of a child. The responsibility as a parent towards their children is a greater responsibility as one wrong doing can change the perception of the child towards the parent. It is easy to become a parent but sometimes it gets difficult to play the role. Parents nurture their children from the day they are born till they are grown enough to lead their own lives. Parents act as a guardian, friend, philosopher and guide to their children. Parents are whole world to their children.
Family values needs to be inculcated in the child when they start understanding the world around them. They need to be taught what is right and what is wrong. Mistakes need to be pointed out and sorted out in the best possible way. Do not be too harsh on your child. We as parents need to learn the art of handling children. Talk in the language of the child but the communication needs to be perfect and the thread should not be broken. Mother spends a large chunk of the day with her child. A child will inculcate all the values and learning's from her. Every spoken words carves an impression on the child whether good or bad. Good habits need to be taught. They also need to be taught to give respect to their elders and love younger ones. The joy of sharing and caring for everyone, to become religious and thank God for everything she has given us.
What to speak and what not to speak in front of elders, patterns of behavioral, personal hygiene, how to take care of themselves. It is the responsibility of every parent to make their child in to independent individual beings . They should be taught how to handle pressure of day to day life and pressure of exams. Communicate with your child daily and keep sharing so that you are updated about the mental status of the child. You should be able to read your child. Every day is a learning experience and each day is new. As a child grows he/she gets distanced from the parents and gets closer to their friends. The behavioral changes can be prominently felt. This is the time when the child can walk on the wrong path and gets distanced from their parents. Until and unless the family values are strong enough it is difficult to keep the child grounded and away from evils happening around him or her.
It is not something which can be done by pressure but by making the family values strong and showing the child to differentiate between what is right and what is wrong. We need to make them good decision makers and allow them to take decisions and even guide them in taking correct decisions rather than deciding everything for them. Parenting style should not be autocratic i.e whatever the parent says the child is bound to follow whether it is right or wrong. Such type of children tend to betray their parents in the long run and even take stern measures not acceptable to the family. Give your child ample freedom but you need to check that the freedom is not misused. Too much restrictions causes problems and children are more likely to break them. Get close to your child and do not hide anything from them. If you are struggling hard for earning money and making ends meet tell them. They should understand it. They will learn what they see around them and do every day. Nothing happens on one fine day.
The emotional and hormonal changes happening in the child makes them more vulnerable to depression and mood swings. Talk with your child and be free and frank with her. Do not feel shy to share anything with your child which you feel correct. Now a days school going children start smoking from a tender age when they do not know the side effects of smoking. When you get aware talk to your child and explain her the problems caused by smoking in the long run and what are their priorities now. Show them direction. Hold their hand and help them in setting goals. Be a part of it and they will love to achieve the goal. Once a goal is achieved set a new goal. Tell them to set goals in every sphere of life. Family, studies, sports etc. When they achieve it celebrate the success by an ice cream, small family party or any way which brings joy to him.
Talk to your child everyday or as often as possible. They can take extreme measures if they are left alone on their own. Understand the needs of your child but do not interfere too much in their life as they too need their own personal space. Make them effective decision makers. Let them bear the consequences of the decisions they have taken so that they know to differentiate between right and wrong. If you take each and every decision for them they will not grow as independent individuals but they will become dependent on you for everything. Help them and guide them when needed.
Point out the negative but do not forget to appreciate the positive. We as parents are busy pointing out the negatives and forget to appreciate the positive aspects of our child. A child will do anything to grab attention of his parents so noticing positive aspects will mold them as positive human beings. Most of the time parents do not involve their children thinking them to be small but when they really grow up they do not do anything as the habit of doing few chores were never inculcated in them. Give them the work which suits them the best, involve them if you do everything they will just watch and never help you out.
Make your child emotionally tough so that they can stand tall under all circumstances and know how to handle stress and tension. Making them mentally strong will help them grow as good individuals. Check what your child is watching on television or online. If you smell something wrong you need to sit and talk and if it something which is not acceptable do let them know. Give them time. It really takes time to develop a good habit or a bad habit.
Children learn by doing. Every child is different. Do not compare. Parents are in the habit of comparing their child to others which leads to a feeling of inferiority. Some may be good in studies others in sports. Help them nurture their talents along with their studies. Do not ask them to become a book worm. For full physical and mental growth a child needs to be exposed to everything. Just being good in studies will not make them successful if they do not know have an active social life. Inculcate in them family values but yes do not force. Try to show them the right path. They will understand and follow. Support your child, your child should never feel lonely and let down. There should be faith that at last he can turn to his parents and share his sorrows and they are the ones who will sort out their problem. Do not get predictable but understand your child and then react to situations.
Parents are role models for their children. The way you behave in front of them the same they will copy and imbibe it within themselves.